This post from Amy Armitage and Joe Whyte at lunartics.
They present the 60 reasons why web hosts suck. I have included a few of my favorites below:
Your host asks you to verify your account by repeating your password over the phone. Every time you say it, you hear a stifled giggle and they say “I’m sorry sir can you please repeat that?” Your password is IamTheBe$tLOVER
A cyber squatter picked up your domain name and is holding it hostage. You find out it’s the guy from your web hosting companies support team who you previously screamed at and called a stupid moron.
Your user control panel consists of 2 options. On and Off!
canceling - they’ll claim they let you cancel anytime within the contract, but it turns out you can’t ever get a refund (you have to write a letter in your own blood to prove you are who you say you are, then send it to their office in Nome, Alaska that reads mail only once a year during the famous dog sled race). Of course, when you complain about these points, they point you to their TOS where it spells out the whole Nome and dog sled stuff, although it doesn’t mention the writing the letter in your own blood (the person on the phone just made that up to be funny).
Read the full post here